Okay, if you’ll all just gather
around me for a few seconds, I’ll give you a wee bit of
information about this glorious building in front of you.”
The guide smiled encouragingly at the group of tired and
somewhat bedraggled-looking tourists milling around the
front of St. Anne’s Shandon Church.
“That’s it, darlin’,” he cajoled in his exaggerated Irish
lilt, the emerald-green scarf in his hand waving impatient
circles around his portly frame. “Move in a little closer,
young lady. I won’t bite you.” His smile widened,
revealing a bottom row of spectacularly stained and
crooked teeth.
Good thing her husband hadn’t made the trip to Ireland
after all, Marcy Taggart thought, taking several reluctant
steps forward. He’d have interpreted the poor man’s lack
of a perfect smile as a personal affront. People spend all
this money on facelifts and designer clothes, and they
forget about the most important thing of all—their teeth,
he often fumed. Peter was an orthodontist and therefore
prone to such pronouncements. Hadn’t he once told her that
the first thing that had attracted him to her wasn’t her
slim figure or her large, dark brown eyes but rather her
obvious regard for oral hygiene, as evidenced by her
straight, flawlessly white teeth? To think she’d once
found such statements flattering, even romantic; Marcy
marveled at it now.
“Can I have your full attention, please?” the tour guide
asked with only a hint of reproach in his voice. He was
clearly used to the casual rudeness of those in his charge
and had ceased to take offense. Even though the largely
middle-aged group of twenty-four men and women had paid a
lot of money for the day’s excursion to Cork, the Republic
of Ireland’s second- largest city, with a population of
approximately 120,000, only a handful of those in
attendance had actually been paying attention to anything
the man had been saying since leaving Dublin.
Marcy had tried, she really had. She’d repeatedly
instructed herself to focus as the guide educated them on
the history of Cork during the seemingly interminable bus
ride, 168 miles of severely congested highway and narrow
country roads. She’d learned that the name Cork was
derived from the Irish word “corcach,” pronounced “kar-kax,”
meaning “marshy place,” because of its situation on the
river Lee; that it had been founded in the sixth century
AD and now served as the administrative center of county
Cork, and that it was the largest city in the province of
Munster. Corkorians, as they were known, often referred to
Cork as “the real capital of Ireland.” Its nickname was
“the Rebel County,” the town’s reputation for
rebelliousness having something to do with its support of
the English pretender Perkin Warbeck back in 1491,
following the War of the Roses. Today it was better known
as the heart of industry in the south of Ireland, the
chief industry being pharmaceuticals, its most famous
product none other than Viagra.
At least that’s what Marcy thought their guide had said.
She couldn’t be sure. Her imagination had an unfortunate
tendency to get the better of her these days, and at
fifty, her once prodigious memory for facts both useful
and otherwise was no longer what it used to be. But then,
she thought, grit-filled eyes surreptitiously scanning the
glazed faces of her fellow travelers, all clearly years
past their “best before” date, what was?
“As you can see, because of its envious hilltop position,
the tower of St. Anne’s Shandon Church dominates the
entire north side of the city,” the guide was saying now,
his voice rising to be heard over the other competing tour
groups that had suddenly materialized and were jockeying
for position on the busy street corner. “St. Anne’s is
Cork’s prime landmark, and its giant pepper-pot steeple,
which was built in 1722, is widely regarded as a symbol of
the city. No matter where you are in the downtown area,
you can see the marvelous stone tower, on whose top sits a
gilt ball and a unique fish weather vane. Two sides of the
tower are faced with red sandstone, the other two with
white limestone, from which the colors of the Cork hurling
and football teams are taken.” He pointed toward the
large, round, black-and-gold clock in the middle of the
bottom tier of the four-tiered steeple. “Corkorians depend
on Shandon clock for their time and its weather vane for
their weather forecast.” A gentle chorus of bells suddenly
drifted down the hill from the church, bringing forth oohs
and aahs from those nearby. “That’s our famous peal of
eight bells,” the guide said proudly. “As you’ve probably
already noticed, you can hear them all over the city all
day long. And if you choose to climb the belfry, you can
even play the bells yourself. Any tune you want, although
most people seem to pick either ‘Danny Boy’ or ‘Ave
Maria.’ ” He took a deep breath. “Okay, you have thirty
minutes to visit the inside of the church, then we’ll head
over to Patrick’s Hill, so you can get a feel for its
steepness. Americans say it rivals the notorious streets
of San Francisco.”
“What if we’re not up to the climb?” an elderly woman
asked from the back of the crowd. “I think I’m all
churched out,” the man beside her muttered.
“I don’t know about the rest of you, but I could use a
pint of Guinness.”
“For those of you who have seen enough and would prefer to
enjoy a bit of rest and relaxation before heading back to
the bus, there’s no shortage of pubs in the area. Although
you’re more likely to find the locals drinking Murphy’s or
Beamish, two stouts that are brewed right here in Cork.”
“Sounds good to me,” someone said.
“We’ll meet back at Parnell Place Bus Station in one
hour,” the guide announced. “Please be prompt or we might
not have enough time to visit the famous Blarney Castle on
our way back to Dublin. And you don’t want to miss out on
kissing the legendary Blarney Stone, do you?”
No, we certainly wouldn’t want to miss out on that, Marcy
thought, recalling Peter’s revulsion at the idea of being
held by his feet and suspended backward and upside down
like a bat in order to kiss “some dirty piece of
bacteria-soaked gray rock coated with other people’s
saliva,” as he’d so memorably phrased it when she’d first
shown him the brochures. “Who in their right mind would
want to do such a thing?” he’d asked accusingly.
Marcy had smiled and said nothing. Peter had ceased
believing she was in her right mind some time ago.
Wasn’t that why she’d agreed to go on this trip in the
first place? Hadn’t everyone been telling her that it was
important— some said crucial—for both her mental health
and her marriage that she and Peter spend more time
together, time in which they could come to terms with what
had happened, as a unit? Wasn’t that the term her
psychiatrist had used?
So when her sister had first floated the idea of a second
honeymoon in honor of their twenty-fifth wedding
anniversary, Marcy had thrown herself into its planning
with every fiber of her being. It had been Peter’s
suggestion to go to Ireland, his mother having been born
in Limerick. He’d been talking for years of making a
pilgrimage to the land of his ancestors. Marcy initially
argued in favor of somewhere more exotic, like Tahiti or
Bali, someplace where the average July temperature was
substantially more than sixty-six degrees, where she could
sip mai tais on the beach and wear flowers in her hair
instead of a place where Guinness was the order of the day
and the humidity would pretty much guarantee she’d always
look as if a clump of unruly moss had just landed on her
head. But what difference did it make where they went,
she’d reasoned, as long as they went there as a unit?
So Peter’s choice it was.
And ultimately, Peter had chosen someone else.
Did one person still qualify as a unit? Marcy wondered
now, recognizing that as much as she loved the
often-spectacular scenery and the much-vaunted forty
shades of green of the Irish countryside, she hated its
dull, rain-filled skies and the pervasive dampness that
clung to her like a second skin.
He couldn’t take any more drama, he’d said when he told
her he was leaving. It’s better this way. We’ll both be
better off. You’ll see, you’ll be much happier. Hopefully,
eventually, we can be friends. The cowardly clichés of the
deserter.
“We still have a son together,” he’d told her, as if she
needed reminding.
No mention of their daughter.
Marcy shivered, gathering the sides of her trench coat
together, and decided to join the ranks of those opting
for a brief respite and a pint of beer. They’d been on the
go since their bus had pulled out of Dublin at eight
thirty that morning. A quick lunch at a traditional Irish
pub when they’d first arrived in Cork had been followed by
a three-hour walking tour of the city, a tour that
included such landmarks as the Cork city jail, spelled
“gaol”; the Cork Quay Market, pronounced “Kay”; the opera
house; and St. Fin Barre’s Cathedral, as well as a stroll
down St. Patrick’s Street, the city’s main shopping
thoroughfare. It was now concluding with this visit to St.
Anne’s Shandon Church and a proposed hike up the steep
slope of Patrick’s Hill. Since Cork’s center was located
on an island lying between two branches of the river Lee,
the city naturally divided into three main sections: the
downtown core known as the “flat of the city,” the North
Bank, and the South Bank. Marcy had spent the entire
afternoon crossing one bridge after another. It was time
to sit down.
Ten minutes later, she found herself alone at a tiny table
for two inside another traditional Irish pub overlooking
the river Lee. It was dark inside, which suited the mood
that was rapidly overtaking her. She was crazy to have
come to Ireland, she was thinking. Only a crazy woman goes
on her second honeymoon by herself, even if the trip had
already been paid for in advance, even if most of the
money was nonrefundable. It wasn’t as if she couldn’t
afford the loss of a few thousand dollars. Peter had been
more than generous in his settlement offer. Clearly he’d
wanted to get away from her as quickly and with as little
effort as possible. Marcy found herself chuckling. Why
should he put any more effort into their divorce than he’d
put into their marriage?
“You find something amusing, do you?” a voice asked from
somewhere above her head. Marcy looked up to see a
roguishly handsome young man with enviably straight black
hair falling into luminous, dark green eyes. She thought
he had the longest eyelashes she’d ever seen.
“What can I get you, darlin’?” the young man said, notepad
and pencil poised to take her order.
“Would it be too ridiculous to order a cup of tea?” Marcy
surprised herself by asking. She’d been planning on having
a Beamish, as the tour guide had suggested. She could
almost hear Peter admonish her: It’s just like you to be
so contrary.
“Not ridiculous at all,” the waiter said, managing to
sound as if he meant it.
“Tea sounds wonderful,” she heard someone say. “Could you
make that two?” Beside her, a chair scraped the wood
planks of the floor. “Do you mind if I join you?” The man
sat down before Marcy had a chance to respond. Marcy
recognized him as a member of her tour group, although she
couldn’t remember his name. Something Italian, she
thought, placing him in the window seat three rows from
the front of the bus. He’d smiled at her as she’d made her
way to the back. Nice teeth, she’d heard Peter whisper in
her ear.
“Vic Sorvino,” he said now, extending his hand.
“Marcy Taggart,” Marcy said without taking it. Instead she
gave a little wave she hoped would satisfy him. Why was he
here? There were other tables he could have chosen to sit
at.
“Taggart? So you’re Irish?”
“My husband is.” Vic looked toward the long bar that ran
the entire length of the room. “I’m sorry, I didn’t
realize you were with anyone,” he said, although he made
no move to relinquish his chair.
“He’s not here.”
“Doesn’t like bus tours?”
“Doesn’t like being married,” Marcy heard herself say. “At
least to me.”
Vic looked vaguely stunned. “You’re not big on small talk,
are you?”
Marcy laughed in spite of her desire not to and pushed at
the mop of curls falling into her narrow face. So much
hair, she thought in her mother’s voice, for such a tiny
face.
“I’m sorry,” she said now. “I guess that falls under the
category of too much information.”
“Nonsense. I’m of the school that believes information is
always useful.” “Stick around,” Marcy said, immediately
regretting her choice of words. The last thing she wanted
to do was encourage him.
The waiter approached with their teas.
“He probably thinks we’re crazy, ordering tea in a pub,”
Marcy said, following the handsome young man with her eyes
as he returned to the bar, watching him flirt with several
of the women clustered on high stools around him. She
watched him fill half a dozen mugs of draft beer and slide
them with a flick of his wrist across the dark polished
wood of the bar toward a group of noisy young men at the
far end. His female admirers broke into a round of
admiring applause. He can have any woman he wants, she
thought absently, estimating his age as early thirties and
wondering if her daughter would have found him attractive.
“Actually, Americans have the wrong idea about Irish
pubs,” Vic was saying, his easy baritone pulling her back
into the conversation. “They’re not bars, and they’re as
much about socializing as drinking. People come here to
see their friends and neighbors, and lots of them choose
tea or soft drinks over alcohol. I’ve been reading the
guidebooks,” he admitted sheepishly, then, when Marcy
remained silent, “Where are you from?”
“Toronto,” she answered obligingly.
“Toronto’s a lovely city,” he said immediately. “I was
there a few times on business.” He paused, obviously
waiting for her to ask: When? What business? When she
didn’t, he told her anyway. “It was a few years back. I
was in the manufacturing business. Widgets,” he said.
“You manufacture midgets?” Marcy asked, realizing she’d
been listening with only half an ear. Vic laughed and
corrected her gently. “Widgets. Small, mechanical devices
whose names you usually can’t remember. Gadgets,” he said,
explaining further.
Marcy sipped her tea and said nothing. I’m an idiot, she
thought.
“I sold the business and retired last year,” he continued.
Then, when no further questions were forthcoming, “I’m
from Chicago.”
Marcy managed a tepid smile. She’d always liked Chicago.
She should have gone there, she was thinking as her cell
phone began ringing in her purse. Chicago had wonderful
architecture and interesting neighborhoods. It didn’t rain
almost every day.
“Is that your phone?” Vic asked.
“Hmm? Oh. Oh,” she said, locating it at the bottom of her
purse and lifting it to her ear. “Hello?”
“Where the hell are you?” her sister demanded angrily.
“Judith?”
“Where have you been? I haven’t heard from you in over a
week. What’s going on?” “Is everything all right? Has
something happened to Darren?”
“Your son’s fine, Marcy,” her sister said, not bothering
to mask her impatience. “It’s you I’m worried about. Why
haven’t you returned any of my calls?”
“I haven’t checked my messages.”
“Why the hell not?” Because I didn’t want to speak to you,
Marcy thought, but decided not to say. Judith was
obviously upset enough already. Marcy pictured her sister,
older by two years, pacing the marbled floor of her new
luxury condominium. She was undoubtedly dressed in her
standard uniform of black yoga pants and matching tank
top, because she’d either just finished working out or was
just about to start. Judith spent at least half the day
exercising—a thirty-minute swim first thing in the
morning, followed by an hour or two of spin classes, then
an hour and a half of “hot yoga” in the afternoon.
Occasionally, if time allowed and she was in the mood,
she’d throw in an additional Pilates class, “for my core,”
she insisted, although her stomach was already as hard and
flat as steel. Possibly she was munching on a piece of raw
carrot, Marcy thought; her sister’s diet consisted solely
of sushi, raw vegetables, and the occasional spoonful of
peanut butter. Judith was on husband number five. She’d
had her tubes tied when she was eighteen, having decided
when she and Marcy were still children never to have any
of her own. “You really want to take that chance?” she’d
asked.
“Something’s not right,” she said now. “I’m coming over.”
“You can’t.” Marcy allowed her gaze to drift toward the
pub’s large front window.
“Why not?”
“Because I’m not there.”
“Where are you?”
A long pause. “Ireland.”
“What?”
“I’m in Ireland,” Marcy repeated, knowing full well Judith
had heard her the first time and holding the phone away
from her ear in preparation for Judith’s shriek. “Please
tell me you’re joking.”
“I’m not joking.”
“Is someone with you?”
“I’m fine, Judith.” Marcy saw a shadow fall across the
front window. The shadow stopped and waved at the
bartender. The bartender acknowledged the shadow’s wave
with a sly smile.
“You aren’t fine. You’re off your rocker. I demand you
come home instantly.”
“I can’t do that.” The shadow stepped into a cone of
light, then turned and disappeared. “Oh, my God.” Marcy
gasped, jumping to her feet.
“What is it?” Vic and Judith asked simultaneously. “What’s
going on?” her sister added.
“My God, it’s Devon!” Marcy said, slamming her hip into a
nearby table as she raced for the door.
“What?”
“I just saw her. She’s here.”
“Marcy, calm down. You’re talking crazy.”
“I’m not crazy.” Marcy pushed open the pub’s heavy front
door, tears stinging her eyes as her head swiveled up and
down the tourist-clogged street. A light drizzle had
started to fall. “Devon!” she called out, running east
along the river Lee. “Where are you? Come back. Please
come back.”
“Marcy, please,” Judith urged in Marcy’s ear. “It’s not
Devon. You know it’s not her.”
“I know what I saw.” Marcy stopped at St. Patrick’s
Bridge, debating whether or not to cross it. “I’m telling
you. She’s here. I saw her.”
Excerpted from Now You See Her by Joy Fielding Copyright © 2011 by Joy Fielding. Excerpted by permission of Doubleday Canada. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.